My Love Affair With Haagen Daas |
Posted: August 20, 2013 |
My Love Affair With Haagen Daas Read a blog by Karen Salmonsohn, discussing evil and good behavior in people. Love her writings; she always gets me thinking… In this blog she asked her friend why people are so evil. “People aren’t evil. They’re weak,” was her friend’s answer. Later when she tried to understand why she preferred the word “weak” to the word “evil,” she realized that “weakness” meant there was some hope for change in someone who’d done something “evil”. She went on to reframe the good/evil into weak/strong. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Her blog brought up a LOT of thoughts for me. First, regarding hope… This word is such a mixed bag for me. There are positive aspects, but “hope” can carry an expectation that another person or situation will meet my needs. Not a fan of that; too disempowering. But I don’t want to discuss hope…I want to talk about weak and strong. [and we’ll get to the ice cream soon…] Now, I like the whole reframe from evil to weak. It allows me to allow you. Or me. We both get to be human and it’s ok. That’s when a different aha hit me. In life, the operating system of choice [weak/strong] has quite a powerful impact. Whichever of these systems you choose will determine how you handle life’s setbacks.
I had fooled myself for many years into thinking I was a strong person with a good connection to my Higher Self. [Denial, thy name is Annie.] After my husband died, I went on a roller coaster ride. There were the obvious downs of grief but there were ups that came with being single and alone, as well. I quit making my bed for a while. Not being melodramatic, but I mean really, who cared if I didn’t? I ate ice cream for dinner. A lot. [I think Haagen Daas stock went up just from my consumption.] Moved out west to the desert. So yes, I took advantage of this new freedom. But the downs far outweighed the ups. It took its toll on me, physically and emotionally. I was a hot mess. I am a life coach! Why couldn’t I help myself ? The chasm between who I thought I was [strong] and how I was behaving, [weak] was vast. And it did not make sense to me. That’s when it hit me why I was having trouble and feeling stuck. I couldn’t see that I was operating from the smaller self, not my Higher self! Being strong is not an overnight fast food approach. It takes conscious and constant discipline to be a strong person. And it needs a connection to and a relationship with your Higher Self. Once again, I pretended I was doing everything I could, but all I was doing was avoid and distract…. Often it’s a deep pain which empowers you to grow into that relationship with your Highest self. I needed crisis to see that I wasn’t operating from strength, at all. I was operating on a disconnect of weakness. Who you truly believe yourself to be is often revealed by who you are during times of conflict and crisis. Apparently my tough cookie act was just that – an act.. The act was losing power. This power loss opened the door for my fragile humanity and my vulnerability – which had always been there. I finally had no choice but to face them. Do not see this as a BAD thing, like I first did…oh, Annie’s not as tough as she thought! What this coming out of denial did was allow me to see my control and survival issues. And in this new awareness is where I was able to begin to change. To have a life worth living takes both awareness and effort. Connections get disrupted and we can forget Who we are. Consistent and persistent are the name of the game, here. I don’t believe challenges are there so we grow into better people. No, ma’am. There’s nothing wrong with you; you’re not this broken person needing fixing. In fact, when you look for what’s wrong with you, I guarantee you’ll find it. Perhaps the gift that comes from going through a crisis is about restoring connection with your Higher self and your divinity. Life isn’t happening TO you; it’s happening FOR you. Practice Heaven. We’ll leave the light on… HAVE A PERSONAL COACHING QUESTION FOR FEZZIK? SEND ME AN EMAIL, AND I’LL BE HAPPY TO RESPOND. [email protected]
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