I'm Freaking Out! |
Posted: January 7, 2013 |
I’m Freaking Out!
My rent is due! I’m gonna get fired! My kid is gonna flunk! I will never get married! I’m stuck in this job! I’m going to have a heart attack! This car will never last another month! We scare ourselves silly, don’t we? I know I'm not alone here. We love to torment ourselves with these kind of questions . It’s actually a game we learned to play as a “responsible adult”. It’s called the "what if" game, and we play it every time…
Most of our awful imaginings never happen. No matter. In the moment of our imagination, these silent "what if" questions not only feel possible, but probable. Those two words can cause a whole lot of panic. When we allow those "what if" questions into our minds, the truth is we're NOT being that responsible adult…we’re being the VICTIM. These two little "what if" words completely suck our power away. Deidre Maloney came up with two steps to taking back your power, that I like very much. Try them on and see how they fit. Step #1: Change the Question It turns out the real problem has nothing to do with the scary things we imagine might happen. The problem is with the questions themselves. So no longer ask questions like: What if I go broke? Instead, ask questions like: How can I generate income in fun new ways this year? Changing "what if" to "how can I" puts the power back in your court. Step #2: Change the Answer Sometimes the things we fear when we ask "what if" actually happen. And when it does, what do we do? We deal with it. Sometimes a bad thing happens that we never even thought about. And when it does, what do we do? We deal with it. So when we can't quite escape those pesky "what if" questions, here's a solid answer. "I'll deal with it." It won't be easy. I won't be perfect. But, in the end, it'll be a whole lot better than the anxiety that comes with the ‘what if”. As you begin making plans for the upcoming year, commit to getting your power back. Change the question. Ask yourself: "How can I do this for myself?" Change the answer. Tell yourself: "I'll deal with it if it happens."
Forget the words “what if”. Here’s two much more powerful words: Not anymore. You don’t need to keep old behavior if it doesn’t help you. All you have to say is: Not anymore. I knew you could do it.
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